This is my first grade picture when I attended a private school called
"The Little Red School House". I was too young to attend the public school with my birthday
being in December. I like this picture. I have looked back upon this picture many times in
my life and even have it placed on my dresser. It reminds me of the innocence I was born with.
It reminds me of my personality, gifts, talents, and uniqueness of being "me" which is all
there is in the 1st grade. Yes, we grow up, change and mature in the "ways" of life, but there
are inherent qualities about each of us that we are born with and make us the only "us" there is.
Sometimes, when I felt I was losing my way, I would think back to the times when I was a child,
like in this picture, and it was comforting to remember the "who" I was then, and now, and find
my way back. One of the subjects I excelled in at school was math. Every subject of math just
came easy. I ran into my first grade teacher, Mrs. Epstein, several years after graduation from
college and the first thing she said to me was, "Holly, you were so good at math"! It is comforting
to know that some things in life do not change and to remember that the gifts, talents, and
uniqueness you were born with will always be you, no matter what changes, or challenges you
face in life.
This picture sums me up in a nutshell! Hard working, disciplined, and goal-oriented.
My life has mostly been about producing. Everything I do needs to be producing something. It needs to
have an answer, solution, completion, goal accomplished. I think one of the most frustrating things
in my life is to work hard and then feel like I am not going anywhere, which I have felt a lot. I think
the going somewhere involves a tremendous amount of focus, knowing where you want to go and what you
want to accomplish. It also involves going into unknown areas and not being afraid to go there. I
competed at the state level in swimming in high school and felt pretty accomplished with that, but
I still always still felt like I was holding back, and not able to fulfill my expectations and potential
with the level of training I was at. In other parts of my life, I have struggled with the how to get
there despite knowing "the what" I want to accomplish. I am just starting now to discover "the how" in
life.
This is the very proud daughter of her dad picture. I got a great job working at NASA
after high school during the summers between my college semesters. I had great fun and everyone there
seemed to like me and treated me so well. How nice! I have always loved my dad so much. We use to go
flying in his T-34 airplane from the time I was in grade school on up until high school. We use to fly
out to Galveston, land, drink a soda, and then fly back. I think when I was flying with him was the
happiest times I have had. He also would take me riding on his BSA 1000 motorcycle in the evenings.
When I was young, I did not really understand exactly what an astronaut did at work. My dad did have
an office, but this water tank was his great big office where for a long time he specialized in
designing the EVA suit for space shuttle flights. Also, I remember when me, brothers and sisters were
young kids, of course, we loved to go running up and down the halls of the astronaut's office, which
really is your basic government building like everyone else's, and raid my dad's change and eat ice
cream sandwiches. The astronaut's gym was a favorite of ours too, then going to McDonalds afterwards.
My dad has always been a "dad" to me, never acted smarter than I was, never made me feel I had to
compete with him, and always interested in where I was at on things. He is always more interested in
finding out about the person he is speaking with than trying to impress them with himself. When I
reflect on all his accomplishments, or see a jet fly by, or go hear him speak at one of his speaking
engagements, that is when I get oouing and awing at how smart he is and all that he has done! He is
first and foremost, though, a great dad.
What can I say about this picture? College life can get the best of us. I wanted to
include some picture from my "fall out" period at the University of Texas at Austin and found this one.
After always being so serious, and everyone telling me how serious I was, and always working so hard,
and always trying to go somewhere, I took a break! Yes, partying seemed like a lot of fun at first, and
I have always loved to disco dance, but, somewhere along the way, it started getting the best of me and
it shows in this picture. The previous school I attended was Oral Roberts University, having accepted
Christ as my savior at sixteen years old and being baptized in the Holy Ghost! Yes, there is a Holy
Ghost! This is about a 180 degree turn for me. It was a struggle to find my way back. I didn't get into
any drug habits except for smoking cigarettes which I quit 8 years ago. But that part of my life took
a toll on me for a while. It's part of the time when I reflected back to when I was a child, and how
to find my way back. I have always been interested in psychology, helping people, and it was what I
majored in at UT with a minor in Communications. That has always been a part of me as long as I can
remember, feeling such a compassion for those in need. I did make some great friends there, which I
still have today, and of course, Austin is absolutely lovely. So, I did accomplish something along
the way!
Well, did I find my way yet? I know I am definitely back on the road and heading
there. But first, a little back ground. A few years after college, I became sick with "Chronic
Fatigue Syndrome"(CFS). No, it's not just being fatigued, like a lot of people feel. It's actually
a real disease that affects several major body systems. I had a fever for three years, felt like I
had the flu every day, and like I only had two hours of sleep everyday, and all kinds of other
symptoms. I had mononucleosis as a teenager, and this seemed like mono, but it just went on and on.
I was working as a social worker for Harris County in Houston when I became ill. I was able to work
for three years with it and then had to stop working. I did run a CFS support group here in the NASA
area for three years, so I did accomplish something while I had it! After seeking doctor's advice,
alternative therapy, and also healing from the Lord, I remained sick. I knew that God could heal me,
but I just didn't know the "how" that would take place. Again, we're back to the "how". After eight
years of illness, I went to a church that a NASA Engineer, Jerry Woodfill, had told me about and that
my mother was attending called "Abundant Life Christian Center" with Pastor Walter Hallam and the
Lord instantly healed me from CFS. I instantly knew what the challenge was and how I would walk in
faith. I did have a lot of physical and spiritual challenges after my healing, but I knew I was healed.
Another girl in my support group was instantly healed too, and went from being bed ridden to driving
herself to Oklahoma in three days and, then, in two weeks looking completely healthy! So, I went to
the Abundant Life School of Ministry Bible School there at the church, graduated, and know that I am
called to minister and of course, help people, my biggest motivator in life!
Thanks for taking the time to read about me .. Holly
|
|